Dear Brothers and Sisters,
It gives me great joy to write to you on the occasion of the 16th Sunday in Ordinary Time. I would like to take this opportunity to explore Marriage and Grace. Let us call to mind the definition of a sacrament. “A sacrament is an outward sign, instituted by Christ, to give grace.” Marriage is one of these outward signs where grace is given to a couple. Grace is necessary to live a sacramental marriage which is both a covenant and sacrament.
Many people look at marriage as a contract. Man agrees to do certain things and to live a certain way. Woman agrees to do certain things and to live a certain way. If either party changes things, the contract can be terminated. The contract-based marriage may even feature explicit and implicit exit clauses. This is purely a human approach to marriage.
In a covenant marriage, man and woman promise life-long fidelity come what may. Their agreement…their covenant… is holy, permanent, and indissoluble. Full consent by both man and woman is required to form a marriage covenant. The Lord blesses this union because it is modeled on his union with the Church. Marriage leads to the perfection of the spouses and their sanctification.
A sacramental marriage is a visible, perceptible sign which points to an unseen, divine reality. A sacramental marriage between man and woman makes visible the love of God in this world. The love of man and wife points to the “fruitful love which exists between Christ and His Church”. (LG 11) The scripture describes the love of Christ for the church as a “great mystery”. (Eph 5:32) In addition, scripture tells us that man should love his wife as Christ loves the Church. (see Eph 5:25)
This is both a powerful and beautiful picture of marriage. Question…how can a man and woman live up to this image of a marriage? How can man and wife come to the altar freely, vowing to live together faithfully, fruitfully, and forever? Answer…Only by the grace of God!
So, what is grace? Grace is a gift of love. The word grace is gratia in Latin. Grace is totally undeserved, unmerited, and gratuitous. Humans do not have a claim on grace. God is wholly free in giving His grace. (see Haight, Grace, pp. 6-7) “Grace is the love of God for Humanity…” (Haight, Grace, p. 9)
My good and holy friends, this is what one of my favorite saints has to say about Marriage and Grace:
“Couples have the grace of the married state — the grace they receive in the Sacrament of Marriage — which enables them to live all the human and Christian virtues in their married life: understanding, good humor, patience, forgiveness, refinement and consideration in their mutual relations. The important thing is not to give up the effort, not to give in to nerves, pride or personal fads or obsessions … The grace of God will not be lacking.” (Conversations with Monsignor Escrivá, 108)
May God the eternal Father keep you in His love, so that the peace of Christ may stay with you and be always in your home. Amen.
Deacon Ray Rodriguez
