Every now and then I have the privilege of holding the door for the good people of St. Rose as they come for or leave after Mass. I have even jokingly said this is the first thing they teach prospective deacons to do while they are in formation at the seminary. This past weekend, I decided I would be the doorman for the main entry of the Church for the 10a.m. Mass. I knew it was the first much cooler morning in a good while, but I stood outside and held the door for folks and their families. As I looked at them, it just seemed to get a little bit warmer even though the actual temperature had not. As I continued this, I began reflecting on my ministry as deacon in St. Rose parish. I thought about how many people I had crossed paths with in my twenty years here, people I would never have had the blessing to know if not for the faith the parish had in me. And it is a good number of those who, since I first met them, have taken their place in the Communion of Saints. It was theirs and is your faith coupled with God’s bountiful grace that enabled me to live out this ministry even though to this very day, it was never something I wanted to do. I made this clear at the first gathering of 80+ men who had been called to discern if they were called to the ministry of permanent deacon.
The very first question Fr. Jack Dinkins asked us was “how many of you want to be permanent deacons?” Many hands were raised, but not all. Mine was not.
Father’s next comment really got me to thinking. Very simply, he said if you really WANT to become a permanent deacon, I encourage you to leave now.” I didn’t want to become a permanent deacon so I assumed I had to stay. FYI….nobody left. It was at this moment I decided if I am to do this it will be only by the grace of God and the community that sent me here….YOU. As I was holding the door at the Sunday Mass this past weekend, I realized how that is exactly what has happened to me…. God’s grace and your support and prayers. And even though you might have never known it, your faith, love and prayers have sustained me in those moments over the past 20 years where I once again keyed in on the truth that I still did not want to do this.
I will close this rambling with my sincere thanks for bearing with me as one of your deacons for the past twenty years. I am reminded of a Scripture which speaks to all of us in whatever ministry we serve.“My grace is sufficient for you.”(2Corinthians 12:9) Whether we are engaged in ordained ministry or in our baptismal ministry of “priest, prophet and king”, let us always remember that the Holy Spirit is in charge, thanks be to God. And with this confidence, let us all recommit ourselves to press on and run the race to it’s completion. And as Tiny Tim said: “God Bless Us One and All.”
- Deacon John
